My Sidewalk “Agenda”

So, today is Saturday and that means I get up early, gather my wits and my cane and stand out in front of a reproductive health clinic, watching for and assisting patients getting inside.  We have protesters and so-called “sidewalk counselors” who try their damnest to harass each and every person they think is going in for an abortion.

Why do I call it harassment, you may wonder?  Because they can’t take “no”, “no thank you”, “leave me alone”, “get out of my face”, and/or “fuck off” as an answer, and when you continue to pester someone after they have refused your attention, that’s harassment in my book and in the books of most reasonable people.

You may also be wondering now, “why doesn’t anyone get the police involved?”.  Because that means the harassed has to make the call, come out of the clinic to make a statement, and potentially miss their appointment.  Given that abortions are rather time-sensitive deals (they cost more and become more complicated procedures the greater the gestation period), it’s not good for the patient to have to wait and deal with this nonsense.

And nothing pleases an anti like someone unable to make that appointment.

Here in the Twin CIties, we haven’t heard much from the far off the deep end anti organization Abolish Human Abortion, or as I will be referring to them, AHAssholes.  This is a Protestant movement who thinks if they bleat for Jesus loud and long enough, abortion will just vanish and no one would even dream of doing such a sinful thing.

Yeah, not exactly in touch with reality, these guys.

Starting a few month ago, I noticed a few AHAssholes at my clinic, standing there, holding their signature signs.

One is Black and when I commented to my fellow escort that the signs were large and gross, started calling me “sister” and trying to get me to explain why I found them gross.

Strike one: Never call me sister if we’re on opposite sides of what I can do with my body

Strike two: I don’t have to speak to you

Strike three; You’re AHA.  Fuck offf.

Frankly, if you’re Black and find it okay to hang with a bunch of ‘abolitionists’ for fetuses, given the history our people have had with abolition of not only our bodies but what we chose to do with them, then you were fuck out of strikes to begin with.

Anyway, their numbers and their fucking signs grew, and now we have a dedicated little mob.

They even figured out how to lash their shitty signs to the poles so the wind doesn’t blow them away.

Given what I have seen from reports from other escorts who have this infestation, I was expecting more irrational and obnoxious behavior out of them.

And I was right.  Calling patients murderers, standing by cars until patients get out (a move that our usual Catholics are ace at), fucking around with the property line even after being warned, and just being all around squirrely.

Today, they held up a poor patient who didn’t know she didn’t have to talk to them for minutes, filling her head will all kinds of lies.  I assured her once we were inside, that there were actual counselors upstairs (not 25 year olds with no training in actual counseling), who will listen and honor her choice, minus the obvious agenda.

As I came out, one of the AHAssoles fired off at me. “Don’t pretend like you don’t have an agenda yourself.”  Since “no interaction” is a rule for escorting here, I merely turned to my fellow escort and keep talking.

Since I couldn’t respond on the sidewalk, I will here.  And as usual, don’t expect me to be nice.

Dear AHAsshole,

You bet I have an agenda.  I don’t hide it for a second.

My agenda is to get patients inside of the clinic with dignity and safety.

My agenda is to support.

My agenda is to protect.

My agenda is to make your shitshow difficult to perform.

While you lie, I make a patient laugh.

While you fill them with fear, I give them compassion.

While you talk over them, I listen.

When they give me reasons, it’s because they want to, not because I’m demanding it from them.

And I honor those reasons.

My agenda is access to a safe, legal procedure that 99% percent of those having it will feel relief.

My agenda is choice and honoring that choice.

On the other hand, your agenda is fucked.  Your agenda swarms around people and harasses them.  Your agenda makes you act as if basic social niceties don’t apply to you. Your agenda is full of lies and deliberate shock plays.  Your agenda devalues the role the one with the pregnancy, all in the name of a non sentient fetus.  And I’m not just pulling this out of my ass: I’ve seen your work:

What about the body of the person carrying the fetus? Don’t they matter? Also, why are you gendering a fetus? Most abortions happen before gender can be determined.

With your ridiculous sounding offers to adopt someone’s baby right then and there and your sanctimonious wishes that patients don’t put themselves into hell.  It would be completely ridiculous, if it didn’t cause our patients distress.

It would be ridiculous if you didn’t picket high schools that have on site clinic for their students, like your recent one here at Southwest High?  I’m sure the kids were so moved by this shit:

I mean, these pamphlets start off like conspiracy theorist boilerplate:

…and then devolve into the same spit-flecked babble you’d get from those guys who show up at festivals with those big “God Hates” signs that are just a list of things that I’ve either done or know someone who has (really next time, read one of those signs and just see how many “sins” you’ve done or are, like Homosexuality or Rebellious Women or Drunkard):

Look at that.  If you’re going to wank on about god, at least be as ironically amusing as the label on a bottle of Dr. Bronner’s soap.

So yeah, dear AHAsshole.  I do have an agenda.  My agenda is to stop you.  From escorting to teaching about escorting, to writing these posts, to spreading information about what an abortion really is minus your scare tactics, I will use true compassion and education to combat your bullshit.

So stick that, and your signs right up your ass.

And stay off the property,

No Love,

Me

Linky Roundup!!

Haven’t done one of these in a while, and since I’ll be getting all geared up for a trip to Chicago next week, here’s a list of stuff that has inspired, infuriated, and just plain pissed me off:

Unisex Makeup is now a THING! And it works pretty damned well on stubble!

Street Harassment turns deadly Again. But really, fellas, tell us more about why we should take time out our day to entertain your need to inform us about your boner.

Matthew Klickstein puts his foot in his racist mouth, gets his event at NYCC canceled Insert whining about “free speech violation” that usually happens when people decide they don’t want to associate with asshole anymore.

Olivia gives a well-deserving flipped bird to those who want us to “Get Off Your Phone”

“Students for Life” attempt to shut down Sex Week at University of New Mexico And they have to do this with the same nonsense as showing up to a SouperSalad and pitching a fit because they don’t have a Thanksgiving turkey dinner with all the trimmings on the menu.  You want a week dedicated to abstinence?  Start one yourself, you lazy fucks. Until then, we’ll be over here dealing with the reality of college students having the sex.

Here’s a double dose of We Hunted the Mammoth:

‘JudgyBitch” banned from Twitter. It’s like a person just can’t go around blatantly slandering people (or ‘sharing’ blatant slander without bothering to look into it)

Another woman is driven from her home thanks to more threats  Her crime? Sharing a meme that shows the GamerGaters for the children they are.  And then someone decided to prove the meme correct by throwing a disturbing tanty.  GGer’s want to clean up their image?  They can start by condemning shit like this, instead of clamoring to defend their ‘good’ name.

Now, right now, this weekend, there is a 4-day rally happening in Ferguson.  Catch the beat by beat on Twitter, and #staywoke

ANNNND lastly, apparently 40 Days of Bullshit (I’m sorry, “Life”) happens twice a year, and we got ourselves a fucking crowd showed up and showed out in front of my clinic.  Between myself and fellow escort Brianne, we collected enough witness for me to make my first Storify.  Enjoy our pain!

Alright, that’s it for now.  I might have a new blogpost before I head out for Chicago, maybe not.  You’ll see!

A Good Start

While escorting (been sick for two weeks, so no new fuckery to share, sorries!), two things never fail to break my shriveled black heart:

1. A patient bursting into tears due to the harassment
2. A patient asking me if there’s anything I can do to make the harassment stop

Number one makes me rage, makes me see red, makes me want to shove those brochures down the lying, pathetic. sanctimonious, bullying maws of our merry band of morons.  Number two makes me feel so helpless that I want to cry.  I wish I could do something, say something that would spare our patients from the deluge of bullshit and lies incapable of taking “no”, “leave me alone”, or “fuck off” for an answer.   

And you know what the fucked up part of it all is?  If I was walking downtown and one of those friendly vest wearing hawkers for Save The Children or Amnesty International came up to me and I said, “No Thank You”, they go away. I don’t have to hear them out first, I don’t have to give them a second of my time, I don’t even have to be POLITE about (though I usually am), and they go away.  If they didn’t, I could find a cop and say, “This person is harassing me”, and the cop would do something.  Talk to the person, if there’s enough complaints, even arrest this person.  Downtown, I have the right to not be harassed, no matter how good of a cause they think they are representing to not be harassed.

So, why is it any different when I’m walking into a women’s clinic?  Isn’t me saying “I’m not interested, leave me alone” enough of a hint that I don’t want to be followed and or pestered?  

Hat tip to Jezebel, San Francisco seems to be taking the first step in the very correct direction to stop the harassment of clinic patients and escorts:

Supervisor David Campos announced a joint-effort with San Francisco’s police department along with Planned Parenthood and the City Attorney’s Office, working on legislation that would act as an anti-harassment ordinance. The legislation seeks to prevent the more aggressive harassment that protesters launch at abortion clinics, namely following patients or clinic employees around. It would give police the authority to temporarily move protesters away from a clinic, allowing them to return.

This is exactly what we need, for every clinic in every city in this country.  An anti-harassment law that is aimed to keep patients safe and unbothered by the more pushy and obnoxious elements of the pro-life side. Those who show up to just pray are still allowed (even though personally, I think that’s a form of spiritual bullying), those who show up and just hold up a sign are still allowed, those who even get the occasional, rare patient that will stop and hear them out are still allowed.  

What isn’t okay is reaching into cars, shoving papers at someone, following them to the door (or property line), beckoning them from windows, pestering someone while they pay for parking, and all the other bullshit I see every Saturday and that you can have a lookie by following the #notcounseling hashtag on Twitter.  

Their right to ‘sidewalk counsel’* ends at the right of the patients to say “NO”. 

 

 

 

*And don’t even get me started on what bullshit “sidewalk counseling” is.

 

 

 

 

 

Screw the Rules (or Laws or Manners), I have Jesus: Redux

Saturday, the cops were called on our merry band of morons. Twice.

Were they being overly aggressive? Nope.

Did they lay a finger on an escort?  Nope.

Did they cross the property line and refuse to step back. Nope.

It was a sign.  Two,  actually. There was this one near the front entrance:

“You don’t have to abort!” We also don’t have to listen to you.

 

 

Even God hates your sign

And the same sign lashed to a pole on the other side of the building.

The clinic director, who had recently informed us that we had carte blanche to drop a dime on the protesters when they step out of line, saw these signs and told our long suffering and very supportive security dude to inform the protesters that they cannot attach their signs on those poles.  So he did.  And they said they would.

Ten or so minutes later, they did not move them.  As a matter of fact, every time the wind blew them down, the protester I’ve been calling Creepy Grandpa (who is so very creepy) just lifted it back up.  So, our long suffering and very supportive (and NICE!) security guy came back out and told them he was calling the police.  They would not move their signs until the cops showed up.

They said that.  To his face.

So, we wait, and a cop drives by and the sign is taken away.  Until our long suffering and very supportive and now very annoyed security dude notes the sign on the other sign of the building was still up.  And they weren’t going to move it until the cops told them to.  AGAIN.

Oh, this is going to be an interesting couple of weeks.  I hope they stop.  I hope they get ticketed.  I also hope for spontaneous combustion, if such a thing existed.

During this whole to-do, I overheard one of the merry band whine, “They’re killing babies in there, and they’re worried about a sign?”

*HEADTHUMP*  Screw the laws, huh?

 

While this was happening, I was on my way back outside (after informing the clinic on what was going on i.e. the cops) with a patient, who informed me that when she was coming in with her partner and two kids, one of the merry band leaned in, trying to hand her partner their bullshit brochure (my words, not hers).  She didn’t want her partner to take it, and then the protester started talking about how “they’re killing babies in there.”

With this woman’s two kids in the back.  And these kids were young, all squeaky voiced and endless energy.  Because Screw Manners, huh?

(the mom was awesome, though.  When she gathered the family to return to the clinic for a couple of minutes, she and one of our escorts had them sing the ABC song as loud and as fast as possible to drown them out)

 

Also, THIS STORY.  When questioned about the choice to post graphic pictures of gore where kids who can barely comprehend where babies come from can see them, here was the response:

“It’s not something that I would flaunt in front of a 4 or 6 year old,” responded Law. “But if parents are driving by, they can ask their children to look the other way. Or they can tell their children, this is what some people do to their kids.”

Because Screw Decency. These are the same people who would screech  “What about the children?” if a same gender couple held hands or kissed in public. But Fetal Snuff Porn is perfectly okay.

 

Who needs Laws, Manners, Decency, Empathy, Common Sense, Intelligence, Integrity or Honesty, when you’ve got Jesus on your side?